Time for Willie to Go Nite Nite

By now, most of you will have seen the panhandler who hangs out at Wythe and Adams—the bearded Willie Nelson wannabe who wears a hat and aggressively begs for money at every red light. Since the light there is unbearably long, he has plenty of time to harass residents and visitors alike. (Ironic that he is the first thing people encounter as they enter Poplar Lawn, instead of the yet-unplanted traffic circle.) This mamaluke is the kind of jerk that continues to give Petersburg a bad name. Until recently, Willie was extremely aggressive and often got into fights with motorists. Unlike Charlotte the Crack Whore who holds forth her hands in a pathetic gesture of need, Willie is egotistic, arrogant and nasty. A few weeks ago, after he provoked a few altercations with motorists, and after DOZENS of phone calls to the police he did a little time. But now he is back, with an illegible cardboard sign, and he seems to be a little less belligerent. But last night, with hundreds of people passing through for Friday for the Arts, he urinated behind a car waiting for the light. The police were called and never came. They were called again, and still never came. No doubt they were too busy guarding Alzeena's. Willie will now be a permanent fixture, it seems. But I will reason with him personally this week. He will understand, I am sure.

—Roquentin